"Just ye wait til you hear Johnny And The Self Abusers. Johnny And The Self Abusers, the band
in my head that's gonna blast all those fucking bands here off the stage." - Alan Cairnduff
After meeting Alan Cairnduff in the Doune Castle on a Saturday night in March 1977
and hearing his ideas for a band, the next morning found
Charlie wheeling an amp to
John Milarky's house.
There they witnessed
John Milarky, showing off his first composition
Pablo Picasso, playing guitar and singing into a microphone hanging from the ceiling.
Jim was adamant that it just wouldn't be talk. No problem, said
Milarky: we'll book the Doune Castle, that way we'll have to do it.
Charlie later stated "
We decided, if we were going to do anything, we should do it, sort of, fullheartedly." That included forming an
unweildy line-up of six: adding
Alan McNeil, a guitar playing friend of
Brian McGee and
Tony Donald from
school band days.
So, they hired the Doune Castle, and after one weeks practise, and with
one original song, they were on stage. It was Easter Monday, 1977.
(They weren't the first Glasgow punk band to play live, they were beaten to it three-piece The Jolt by two nights.)
"Charlie and I only had to do it only once to realise that this was what we wanted. It was all lots of fun.
Charlie had a violin, I played the few chords
Charlie taught me on the keyboards and we also had a few girls who
had made themselves up like Indians out for war, at our request. There was a touch of glamour there.
Even then it wasn't punk. No spitting or anything, more like kitsch."
Two weeks later, Johnny And The Self Abusers
played Edinburgh supporting Generation X. "Nobody liked us, so we
started to practise. John Milarky got money from his parents, and we used it to
record a demo." This came to the attention of Chiswick Records, who
promised to release a single in August.
In the meantime, The Abusers continued writing and gigging. All of
Milarky's songs were filtered out (no-one wanted to play his other compositions such as
Toss Yourself Off which
Charlie described as trash), and
Charlie became the main songwriting team.
Tensions started to mount between the two groups. This even erupted into fits of fury; one night, Brian McGee threw a wellington boot through Milarky's front window.
By July 1977, it was obvious that they had nothing in common. But they stuck together - waiting for
the single. They even bought a flat together in October; leading to
more riotous behaviour.
By now, fed-up with the confines of punk, and unhappy with the group's lavatorial name ("I began to feel Johnny And The Self Abusers
sounded like Big Dick And The Four Skins. I can do without that kind of toilet humour"),
Jim changed the name of the group to Simple Minds.
This resulted in calls to Chiswick Records to get the name on the single changed - which was in vain.
"The group's legend far outweighed their musical ability." - Billy Sloan
April 1977 - November 1977
By November 1977, the band ceased to exist; since they were now recording and gigging under the name of